Lyrics

CAN’T LOVE WITHOUT ‘EM

Had this hot teacher, Miss Valentine,
Sent these cold shivers right down my spine.
Asked her to play with me in the sand;
She replied with the back of her hand.
My troubles with women were startin’
Way back then, back in kindergarten.

Oh, cruel women,
Let me tell you about ‘em.
You can’t live with ‘em,
And you can’t love without ‘em.
Oh, no! Oh, no!

I loved this high-kicking cheerleader,
So I said to sweet pom-pom Rita,
“I can see that it’s snowing down south.”
She stopped and punched me right in the mouth.
Told myself, with a tear in my eye,
“Welcome to the world of junior high!”

Oh, cruel women,
Let me tell you about ‘em.
You can’t live with ‘em,
And you can’t love without ‘em.
Oh, no! Oh, no!

Fell for this hippie chick named Willow;
Asked if she’d like to share my pillow.
Gave me a hit on this purple tab,
Somethin’ she cooked up back in the lab.
Never thought I’d get so much knowledge
On my very first day at college.

Oh, cruel women,
Let me tell you about ‘em.
You can’t live with ‘em,
And you can’t love without ‘em.
Oh, no! Oh, no!

Fell upon some hard times since that scene;
Got married to a soda machine .
Thought we’d settle down and have some kids;
Soon after that, our love hit the skids.
I guess I still have so much to learn –
She was “NO DEPOSIT! NO RETURN!”

Now, I’m living down here in Hades,
The home of so many fine young ladies.

Oh, cruel women,
Let me tell you about ‘em.
You can’t live with ‘em,
And you can’t love without ‘em.
Oh, no! Oh, no!

Oh, cruel women,
Let me tell you about ‘em.
You can’t live with ‘em,
And you can’t love without ‘em.
Oh, no! Oh, no!

Copyright © 2006 Lex Zaleta