Lex Zaleta

Lyrics

THE MISTAKE I MADE

I said, “Honey, I’ll buy you the moon and the stars.”
She said, “I’ll marry you right now if you throw in Mars.”
A marriage made in Heaven with some earthly scars.
I’d play it for you now, but she sold all my guitars.

I guess I have to take the biggest part of the blame.
I remember when I told her Monopoly’s just a game.
She said, “I want Park Place and Boardwalk just the same.”
I should have raced past “GO,” grabbed the money, and changed my name.

How long will it be till the whole game’s been played?
How long must I pay for the mistake I made?

Will somebody please explain;
Is this as good as it gets?
She’s a real royal pain,
Yeah, a pain in my assets.

She loves to bet on football, she welcomes all takers,
But it seems none of her wagers are money makers.
I said, “Why don’t you put some money on the Lakers.”
(She said, “What the heck do I know about baseball?”)
And that could very well be the marriage tie-breaker.

She lost 14 straight last weekend;
The more I make, the more she spends.
I close my eyes and try to pretend
She’s really not Barbie and I’m not Ken.

How long will it be till the whole game’s been played?
How long must I pay for the mistake I made?

Will somebody please explain;
Is this as good as it gets?
She’s a real royal pain,
Yeah, a pain in my assets.

She buys mega tons of clothes, can’t buy just one blouse.
Then she goes and tells me, “We need a bigger house!”
My friends are all asking, “Are you a man or a mouse?”
“Please pass the cheese,” is what comes out of my mouth.

She doesn’t think inflation really affects us;
The next car she buys might be the one that wrecks us.
She already has a new Lincoln, and a Lexus.
If states were for sale, she’d probably buy Texas.

How long will it be till the whole game’s been played?
How long must I pay for the mistake I made?

Will somebody please explain;
Is this as good as it gets?
She’s a real royal pain,
Yeah, a pain in my assets.

She’s got way more shoes than Crayola has colors.
One closet’s marked “His” – the other ten are “Hers.”
I read through all our bills and my vision blurs,
Watching my week’s wages turn into weak wagers.

I’ve prayed every prayer that’s ever been prayed;
Even went to a Billy Graham crusade.
How long will it be till the whole game’s been played?
How long must I pay for the mistake I made?

Copyright © 2006 Lex Zaleta